Monday, July 26, 2010

No Excuse Games #1: Bionic Commando (X360)


Reason for playing: Nonsensical plot twists

Every once and a while, I play a game that I really don't have any good excuse for playing. As mentioned in the Geist review, I inevitably will feel drawn to games that at best could be mediocre, and yet I'm impelled to play anyways. I find it important to draw a distinction between having an excuse to play a game, and having a reason to. For instance, I had an excuse for playing Geist in that the possession mechanic was supposed to be pretty unique. The rest of the game could play like shit, but that unique feature intrigued me and gave a reasonable incentive to play the game. Now, the phrase "reasonable incentive" is incredibly subjective, as what is reasonable to me could make no fucking sense to the next person, and yet I feel that I have a decent enough self knowledge to know when I have a fundamentally flawed curiosity towards something vs. a curiosity spurred by a real reason. Enter Bionic Commando, a remake of a classic NES game.

His arm is his wife. That is pretty much my only reason for playing the game. Gamesradar.com has referenced this plot twist non stop for the past year, including photoshopping this photo for their 2009 Anti-Awards. Granted, you don't discover this until the very last level of the game, but to me that just made the game all the better. I was playing through the game with a friend, and every time that Nathan Rad Spencer, the main character, brought up his missing wife, both of us couldn't stop laughing, knowing that the big dramatic payoff at the end of the game was going to involve his wife turning into his arm. It really makes you wonder what Grin, the developer of the game, was thinking, in that their is literally no way to make this twist carry any emotional weight. They tried to explain it as bionic limbs requiring a strong emotional bond to the wearer, and hence his wife sacrificed herself for her husband's benefit. However, at the end of the day his wife turned into his limb. And really, was the sacrifice even necessary? If she was sacrificing herself to save his life, the situation would have gained a little gravity. However, she did it so he'd have an arm. If Michael Ironside could make due without a bionic arm and could just use a plain old cybernetic arm, I really don't see how Nathan Spencer needed one. Additionally, this is the same guy from the original Bionic Commando. I'm pretty sure back then he had a bionic arm that didn't require an emotional connection to a close relative and he rescued Super Joe just fine.

The swinging mechanic that the game employs works fine for the most part, although there aren't enough open sections that let you really a) gain momentum or b) do anything without running into a wall awkwardly. You end up relying on a weird strategy of locking on to walls and beams and zipping yourself to them constantly, which looks pretty awkward but works. When the game does open itself up a little, it can be alot of fun to dispatch your enemies in interesting ways, like jumpkicking them and then firing your pistol at them as you do a backflip off of their chest. However, these sections are tempered by enemies that require cheaper tactics of running away and throwing objects at a distance, which is decidedly less flashy. Your limited to your pistol, grenades, and one additional firearm at all times, but the relatively small arsenal you can carry is forgivable given that the focus of the game is your wife. Arm.

The three main reasons that you will die, other than trying to take on certain enemies head on instead of using the aforementioned cheap tactics, are water, radiation, and the camera. Apparently bionic wives weigh a lot and prevent the user from being able to swim, which means that the second you find yourself in waist deep water, you're fucked. You'll be frantically turning the camera around trying to find something to grapple on to as you drown in 3 feet of water. There's also radiation outside of the path the developers want you to go on. You'll only find out the path the developers want you to use by seeing the flashing radiation symbol, however, as there isn't always a clear indication where you're supposed to go. Finally, the camera will often get stuck on objects or just be incredibly uncooperative, which will lead to unnecessary drownings and missed grapples as you struggle to get the camera to show a competent angle.

The game is about average length for a third person shooter, lasting just about 7-8 hours when we played through on Hard. The level design doesn't vary too much at the beginning, consisting mostly of a destroyed city that is partially underwater and covered with selective radiation. Later on you will visit a city park and a military base, but two thirds of the game consist of going through a barren cityscape.

Bionic Commando is just about what I expected it to be: an average third person shooter with a flawed central mechanic and ridiculous plot twist. Because of my low expectations, its hard to be too disappointed in the game and so I'd say it wasn't a complete waste of time, and yet you're time could be much better spent.


Overall: 6.5
Recommended Price: Borrow it

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